I Survived.

Bet you thought this post was going to be about surviving cancer. It’s not!

For the last two weeks, I’ve had friends come and help me during the week while Wade is at work. My friend Laura comes once a week and helps me with the girls if I have appointments, need to get last minute stuff ready for camping, or need to do some housework or organizing. It’s been amazing having her help and I am ever so grateful that she has the availability to help me out. My friend Rose has been coming with her daughter Meribelle too, we mostly visit but if I have something I need to get done she helps me out or keeps me company while I’m completing my task. It’s been incredible having her too because the girls get socialization as well, BONUS!

This week however, I didn’t have any visitors or extra help. I’ve been struggling mentally with Chemo Brain side effects like trouble multitasking, difficulty with short term memory, difficulty finding the right words and concentrating, short attention span, and I sometimes have problems with visual memory. Things are slowly getting better, so I don’t think that this will be a long term side effect of chemotherapy, thankfully. I’m getting better at multitasking, definitely getting better with my short term memory, my attention span isn’t quite so short anymore either! I still struggle sometimes with finding the right words, but my concentration is getting better. My visual memory has gotten better too, which I’m thankful for. The one thing I have noticed I’m struggling with is sensory overload. For example, I get very, very flustered when both girls are upset and crying, or are both demanding my time. I don’t know who’s needs to attend to first, and sometimes I just get so frustrated that I don’t know what to do, so I make sure Hadley is in a safe place, either on the floor or in her crib and I walk away for a moment to reset. Hailey will usually calm down, and she’s getting better at communicating with me in regards to her needs, she just starts crying when Hadley starts screaming because she also doesn’t know what to do, and she always thinks it’s something that she’s done to make her cry when she hasn’t done anything.

I made it through this week. I made it through nap times, where I didn’t get to nap with the girls, I made it through meal times, bath times, play times, and tantrums. I made it through all of it with a decent amount of patience except for Friday, by 4 o’clock on Friday afternoon my patience were wearing thin and I was beyond frustrated with how cranky the girls had been. Hadley is teething and is having tummy aches, and Hailey just hasn’t been feeling very well, so she has been very needy for my attention.